In honor of Father’s Day, I want to share a few thoughts about Nathan.

Recently, I nominated him for a grant, and that gave me an opportunity to reflect on the man he is. With Nathan Jr.’s birthday and Father’s Day falling so close together, I started thinking even more deeply about grief, love, suffering, and joy.

Nathan would never want to be called a hero, but that’s exactly what I see. Nathan is a devoted husband and father, compassionate, and always ready to help someone in need. Those qualities have always extended beyond our family, but what he is doing now has left me in awe. In the midst of the greatest loss of his life, he continues to serve others and is building something meant to bring hope to our community.

In January 2024, our family experienced the unimaginable loss when our youngest son, Nathan Montez, Jr., died by suicide at just 15 years old. There are no words that can fully explain what that does to a parent, to a family, or to a home. Yet, in the middle of that grief, my husband made a choice that says everything about the kind of man he is.

With a heart broken into a million pieces, Nathan founded Blue Bee Project, Inc. In many ways, Blue Bee Project was born from both the grief of losing our son, and the love Nathan still has for him.

It is a grassroots effort, and he has been learning every step of the way. I have watched him ask questions, build relationships, seek advice, and most importantly, I have witnessed his heart begin to heal and become more hopeful.

At its core, Blue Bee Project exists to honor Nathan’s legacy by helping young people recognize their value, sharing mental health resources, and creating connections so no one feels alone.

HELP SAVE LIVES!? Honestly, this would terrify me. I would constantly feel in over my head.

But Nathan sees things differently. He believes in people and in our community and he just keeps taking the next step. Now this is something I can support. So I took him by the hand and joined him, with our sons, family, and friends following closely behind.

The impact has already begun. In the past three years, Blue Bee Project has awarded nine scholarships to local students. As great as that is, my favorite part was something much smaller. This year, every applicant received a small gift bag with a thank-you note, mental health resources, and a few encouraging items. We wanted every student to leave knowing their story mattered. And with permission, we also shared some of their words on our social media because they had important things to say, and we felt their voices deserved to be heard.

To me, that says everything about Nathan and Blue Bee Project. At its heart, it is about people and honoring our son by reminding other young people that they matter too.

And this is only the beginning. What people see publicly is only a small part of the work. We are still learning as we go. There is so much we hope to build and so many ways we want to serve our community in the years ahead.

I know Nathan is uncomfortable being called a hero. But to me that is exactly what makes him one. Whether he received the award or not doesn’t change what I see. A father who loves his sons with every fiber of his being and tries to be the best dad to them daily. I see a husband and best friend I can lean on, especially when I need it the most. And, I see a man who took the worst thing that ever happened to our family and chose to respond with hope.

Grief and love have walked side by side in our family for several years now. Some days grief feels so heavy, but love is what gets us out of bed and keeps us moving forward. It always has.

Happy Father’s Day, Nathan. I love you.

Thank you for our four sons, for the life we’ve built together, and the love you’ve given all of us. And thank you for taking us on this Blue Bee journey with you when life became incredibly hard. I see how helping others has helped you heal and, in many ways, helped all of us heal too.

You will always be one of the greatest blessings God ever gave me. God knew I needed to be surrounded by good men, and He gave me the best five.